EXCERPTS
Feminism has been blamed for everything from ruining marriages to destroying the social fabric of society.
Now the feminist movement is taking a hit for the rise in infertility rates. In The Big Lie: Motherhood, Feminism and the Reality of the Biological Clock (Prometheus Books), Tanya Selvaratnam writes that when she tried unsuccessfully to have a baby at the age of 37, the cruel reality hit her that while she'd been concentrating on her career, her biological clock had been ticking away.
Selvaratnam writes that she delayed motherhood because feminism encouraged her to get an education and develop her career, a misleading message that she says ultimately caused her much pain. The problem with the author's thesis is that it's wrong.
Feminism's message was never that women could or should delay motherhood as long as they wanted. The message of feminism, and always has been, is that women should have more choices. Period.
It's time to set the record straight on exactly what the feminist movement did achieve. Let's travel back to the 1960s when the second wave of feminism rippled in with Betty Friedan's groundbreaking book The Feminine Mystique. Her book exposed the life of the bored suburban housewife who was living what Friedan called "the problem that has no name."
Friedan's message was that women needed to have more choices beyond motherhood. It was a message that was picked up by feminists such as Gloria Steinem, who gave a voice to issues such as rape, wife abuse and sexual harassment.
Feminists held a critical gender lens to issues and brought about an awareness that has lead to sweeping changes. Women now have far more career choices, such as law and medicine, than women in the 1960s did, and issues affecting women, such as eating disorders, child care and reproductive freedom, became part of the national dialogue.
Unfortunately, while women's lives have changed, a host of other factors stayed the same. So if you want to look at the real culprits behind the struggles women are facing, here are a few suggestions:
Your employer:
Since more women began working outside the home, the biggest change that never happened was in the workplace. Policies such as flextime, part time and telecommuting are still in short supply and going on the mommy track can be career suicide. As a result, many women are working two shifts and are tapped out. Meanwhile, companies rigidly adhere to old-school work schedules and remain blind as to how much talent they're missing out on.
Your partner:
The majority of women will tell you - and copious studies back them up - that they still shoulder the lion's share of housework and child care. Until men start doing their fair share, women won't be able to go for that promotion in the corner office. And we wonder why there aren't more women CEOs.
Government:
One of the biggest challenges women face is in securing quality child care. A universal child-care system would mean more affordable child care and more regulation, and yet only Quebec has such a system. It should be a no-brainer that providing quality child care is important, yet most children are in unregulated care. That's made the juggling act even tougher for women and prevented many from being the mothers they want to be.
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- reprinted from the Hamilton Spectator